My mom and family members say that all these are to be kept within the family and not to loud on the net. But this blog is my diary. I can shout my feelings over here. My diary is open to everyone.
This is not the first time I am saying this. I usually say it around my friends. But this is certainly the first time I am publishing this. I really regret the fact that I got married – its not that I hate my wife. I do love her.
In a typical Indian/malayali society is that you live with your parents perhaps with brothers too. This is where things get complicated. My wife is not just married to me – but rather to my family. She has to mix well with the other members of the family. They too have to accommodate the new person. In my case this is not happening – even when my family is pretty small so far – just me, my mom and my wife. There are constant feuds inside my home. I keep thinking whether we need that couples retreat Indiana counselors offer…
As probably most of you know that I have left my job before my marriage to start a small business with my friend and co worker Sijumon. Our business is still in its infancy – we are light years away from achieving our goals. At the moment we are considering how to get down payment assistance in New Mexico (guide by OnQFinancial). At the present time, we haven’t taken a dime of profit from our business. So financial unstability doesn’t help my matters at all.
We have several financial issues at office, I leave my office and get back home to get some peace. But I now feel that staying in office with loads of issues is far better than getting home. At home, I do get some peace when I am watching my favorite shows or using my PC to browse the net and listen to my favorite DJ. I also love going to any festivals. But even doing this seems to create problems at home.
I had consulted a therapist before, but its not working for me. As most of you know I don’t drink or smoke. I was all against drinking and smoking. But now I am getting why most people do this – they get a small bit of peace of mind when they are drunk…